“Moving to the country. Embracing a simpler, more environmentally friendly lifestyle. Growing your own food. Making do with less. These are familiar fantasies for city dwellers, especially in the wake of a worldwide financial meltdown.” From Amazon.ca.
When I heard that fellow country dweller and garden writer, Sonia Day had a new book out, a memoir about moving to the country, it sounded right up my alley. My husband and I did the same thing, around the same age, more or less.
I know Sonia: we were both columnists at Canadian Gardening magazine and our first gardening books came out at about the same time. We had the same publisher, Key Porter Books, (and they kindly sent me a review copy of Middle-Aged Spread). Sonia’s writing path took a different turn from mine: she went on to write three more gardening books, whereas I embraced web publishing and blogging.
With that background, and country living in common, I thought it would be fun to interview Sonia about her book, so here we go.
Yvonne: Moving to the country seems to be a mid-life rite of passage for many of us. We did it too, of course, but there was a time when it was the furthest thing from my mind. It was March, and I had just driven from Hamilton to my sister’s in Cambridge. The countryside looked bleak, as it does in mud season. “There’s no way I want to live in the country again,” I remember thinking. Yet within a year, we had decided to move to the country. Your situation was similar, wasn’t it?
Sonia Day Photo: Tracy Cox
Sonia: Yes. We’d lived in the country briefly once before, outside Montreal and I had no particular desire to do it again because I was happy in the city.
But I’m an impulsive person by nature, which often gets me into trouble! I love new adventures – always have.
The Man in my Life complains about it – but I think too many of us are frightened to take the plunge into doing something different and thus wind up bored and bitter in middle age.
My motto for living has always been “You only regret the things in life that you DON’T do, not the things you do.” So when this rather ordinary house in the country suddenly had this peculiar effect on me, I knew I had to buy it.
Yvonne: In the book, you’re pretty direct about some things you notice in the country: hunting, acceptance of pesticides like Roundup, hidden marijuana plots, that fact that nobody in your nearby small town worries much about calories and it shows. Has there been much reaction locally to your book?
Sonia: Oh dear, yes. Lots of local reaction – but I expected that. It’s why my publisher and agent thought it would be a good idea to change the name of the small town in question! But I did want to write a frank, honest and hopefully humorous book, not simply some pretty essays about the joys of country living. There are too many books like that around. Frankness has always been my forte (gets me into trouble too.) And most people seem to love the book and find it very funny.
Yvonne: You write that you’re really into vegetable gardening now. I was too at the beginning, but the garden became too much work and something had to give. With just two of us and farmers’ markets all around, I decided to grass in the veggie garden. What keeps you at it?
Sonia: The sheer joy of harvesting and cooking my own food. I love trying out new different things that you can’t find even at a farmers market. I also hate shopping for anything – I’m your original non-consumer. So I turn a lot of my produce – like braids of homegrown garlic – into gifts for friends, and that’s vastly easier than traipsing around some shopping mall.
Yvonne: I enjoyed how you put the anti-lawn folks in their place. When someone you describe as a “tiresome eco-evangelist” visits from city and criticizes your lawn, you ask: “What do you propose we do out here? Let the whole place turn into an overgrown jungle? Get eaten alive by mosquitoes every time we go outside?” Lawns might be unnecessary in the city, but I can’t imagine any other groundcover that’s as practical for a country property. Are you still having to defend your lawn?
Sonia: Yes, unfortunately. I hate to say it, but eco-evangelists who live in the city and have postage stamp backyards are the new Puritans – always preaching and trying to lay down the law to everyone else. They need a reality check.
Yvonne: I guess city folks have no idea what it’s like to contend with country weeds, do they?
Sonia: No. In fact, I feel very sorry for farmers nowadays, They work like dogs, are constantly painted as villains trying to “poison the world” yet people in the city have absolutely idea what it’s like to cope with a huge acreage covered with literally millions of weeds. I’m thinking of writing another book – probably a novel this time – on the clash between rural and city values, because they are worlds apart – and sadly getting wider all the time.
Yvonne: What’s your best piece of advice for country gardeners?
Sonia: Don’t try to do too much at once. It’s easy to get carried away with fantasies, but you’ll get exhausted and disenchanted quickly. Put in a big expanse of lawn at first (sorry, eco-evangelists, but it is relatively easy to care for and does mean less mosquitoes), but don’t use pesticides on the grass and don’t expect it to look perfect. Then add flower beds, trees, shrubs and vegetable gardens a little at a time.
Yvonne: What surprised you most about living in the country? And what do you miss most about living in the city?
Sonia: The most surprising thing is how much I love it here. I thought I would feel lonely and isolated living on a dirt road in the middle of nowhere, but I really don’t. Cabin fever has never hit me. I have neighbour friends now, but I like the distance between us because I’ve become very attached to my privacy. We get together when we want to, but we’re not in each other’s faces all the time as you are in the city. And having assumed the mantle of BOFFIE (Boring Old Fart), I’m now a fanatic about noise. God, what a noisy world we live in! It’s wonderful to escape that. I do sometimes miss the ease of city living – being able to walk to the convenience store for a jug of milk, or hopping on the subway to go to an art exhibition downtown or see a play. But that’s about it.
Yvonne: Oh, can I ever relate to that! I can’t stand noise either. What about winter? Do you think it’s easier in the country than the city?
Sonia: In many ways, yes – because there’s less traffic on the roads. In the city, it’s always chaos after a storm – all those stupid drivers who can’t be bothered to get snow tires! Country people are much more practical about such matters and I like that. And how beautiful winter can be in the country! I never realized how clean and white snow could look till we made the move up here.
Thanks to Sonia for a great interview. Middle-Aged Spread (how clever is that title!) is available at Amazon.com and from Amazon.ca. Visit Sonia’s website, soniaday.com, for more info about her writing and her artworks.